so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
