i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
