so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
40s are totally the cure
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
