"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Randomize
