just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
sex in a hospital.. check
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
