I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize