areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
