Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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