She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
