Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
