haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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