I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize