State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Randomize
