Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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