So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Randomize
