That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
