where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
