Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Randomize
