I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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