Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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