Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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