Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
you didnt know i had herpes?
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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