If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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