btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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