I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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