so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
