So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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