is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize