is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
