I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
