can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize