That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
