Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
