Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
