dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
