new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
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