I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Randomize