How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
