question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
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