i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize
