someone get that fucking seahorse.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
