What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
