I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
