i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i want to fuck
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it's pretty self explanatory
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
