Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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