Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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