Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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