i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
The Olympian is in my bed
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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