Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize