I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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